Saturday, February 28, 2009


We got our taxes done today. I knew that my state offers a stillbirth tax refund sort of thing. Basically, if you have a certificate of stillbirth you get $150 back on your state income taxes (thanks Michigan). I was not going to bring it up because, hello, I do not feel like reliving the whole ordeal with my tax guy. Who is a nerdy guy in his, oh I'd say 90's.

My husband saw the Stillbirth Benefit and he jumped all over that like flies on shit. My tax guy instantly got awkwardly nervous (because what else do you do when someone tells you they just had a stillborn baby). Exactly what I wanted to avoid. He looked into it and you have to have a copy of the certificate of stillbirth to attach to your refund. I didn't bring it with me. I told him to skip it. I was already pissed my husband brought it up and made the whole thing so uncomfortable. He said, "Are you sure, it's $150?" I told him I was sure.

I love my husband, but sometimes he is so fricking dense. A few minutes later he brought it up again and asked the tax guy if he can look the certificate up online! I am not a yeller. Especially in public. I am not the sort of wife who puts her husband down in public. But I lost my mind. I didn't exactly yell, but raised my voice, "Would you just drop it!" My husband knew he screwed up. Seriously, let's relive the worst experience of my entire life so that we can save $150. I was so irritated. I have to go hide in the bathroom so I didn't kill him

When I came back, the tax guy was just finishing up. He asked us the normal questions: "Address still the same? You live together right?" My husband looked at me sheepishly and said, "Yeah, we do. At least until we leave".

He is so lucky I love him.


Foreverloves said...

I know he meant well...but...yeah. I agree. We were able to claim our boys this year, only because they were initially born alive. What a difference, and yet it's so small of a difference really. It's all in the eyes of the state, I guess. We took the excess and made a donation to our hospital. We weren't sure if we were going to do it. It's so touchy and so sad.

JenJen said...

Yeah, I wrote a post regarding our taxes and the whole stillborn issue when we had our taxes done this year, but Georgia doesn't offer anything...and $150 dollars wouldn't be worth it to me either. I'm sorry that you and your honey are on a different page in the grieving book.