Tuesday, February 24, 2009


You can not imagine the horror that was my doctor's appointment today. You really can't. First off the nurse asked me how my baby was doing. I said, "My baby died. My uterus ruptured." She looked quickly through the chart (as if I was wrong!) and said she was sorry. Then she talked about the weather. This would not be that bad, except that this has happened every time I've went to this doctor since Brenna was born. Every time. You think they would note it somewhere on my chart that I lost a baby. Guess they don't.

The doctor has two offices, and the last time I was at this office was a year ago, and I was still pregnant. They put me in the same room I was in during my last visit. I did not imagine it would be hard, but it was very hard. I was already feeling vunerable because of the incident with the nurse, and being in that room- remembering hearing her hearbeat- it was just too much.

Then the doctor came in, and he made small talk. He talked about how he was doing sex ed classes for kids, and blah, blah, blah. Then he said one of the most inappropriate things I think a doctor has ever said to me. Mind you while he is telling me this I am sitting there covered with a paper towel because I'm there for my yearly exam also. He goes on to tell me how a nursing student was recently assisting him with a surgery and afterwards she said she had to ask him a question. She then told him (and I am quoting him), "When I put my husband's penis in my mouth, I suck, I don't blow. So why is it called a blow job? Am I doing something wrong?" I am not kidding. As if his retelling of the "boner" questions the sex ed kids asked wasn't enough, he had to tell me this! I was beyond disgusted.

Right before I left he asked me about having another baby. I told him I would love to, but reminded him that I was cautioned against it. Then he went on to tell me how dangerous uterine ruptures can be, and then told me how he saved someone's life last year and proceeded to tell me my own story. I kid you not. I can't imagine that he sees that my uterine ruptures, but he totally forgot who I was and had no idea why I was there! At first I thought he was joking, but he was dead serious telling me, "Dead baby, almost a dead mama from all the blood loss..." I could not believe it. I was so dumbfounded that I walked out.

My husband was in the waiting room. I walked past him out into the car. I told him the highlights of what happened, and then I started crying. I am not an emotional person at all, but I started crying. I was so hurt, and angry. It was without a doubt the worst doctors visit of my entire life.

Needless to say I am looking for a new doctor.


JenJen said...

I am positively infuriated for you~ I want to come up there and kick his a**! He really sounds like a tool bag.

I've been thinking of you today, and I'm so sorry that the appointment was so rough~


The Fabulous Ms. Beth said...

Oh --- my---- gosh..
I can't even formulate words.
I'm appalled by that doctors behavior.

CLC said...

You mean your husband didn't go back there and punch him in the face?
How awful! I am so sorry you had to endure this. You can't teach sensitivity in med school. You should write a letter or have your husband call and explain how calouw they are.

Breanna said...

oh holli i am so sorry your appt didnt go well. how inconsiderate of them. i cant believe that he didnt remember you, what a heartless person.

i hope you find a new dr. soon! good luck!

David & Alyssa's Mommy said...

My son died in Jan...but when we found out he had heart problems while I was pregnant the doctor while still doing my ultrasound said "You know we told you this would happen you are diabetic. This is all your fault." I was so hysterical I couldn't even respond. I was later told it had nothing to do with me by my new doctors. I was very blessed to find wonderful doctors after that I never went back to her.

Amy, queen of the world. said...

Stupid, STUPID STUPID STUPID DOCTOR!!!! THERE ARE NOOOOOO WORDS. GRRRR I absolutely ABHORE doctors! @#)$(*#&(*$&#(*$& and then some!!!

G$ said...

I would send him a lovely letter explaining how completely unprofessional and inappropriate he and his staff was. (Although the staff thing doesnt surprise me)

At least write it out, post it here, if you never send it, you will feel better. It's hard to feel violated, little things help to take back control.

Busted said...

Oh my dear god. PLEASE get a new doctor and please write a letter or something to let someone know how horribly inappropriate this doctor is, in every way. I'm so incredibly sorry you had to deal with that.

Mrs. Mother said...

I am so sorry. I want to come up there and tell that doctor off for you. Big hugs.

sherri and Adam said...

Holli.....wow i don't even know what to say to that?!?! The nurse, the sex talk, the forgetfullness of the Dr. I go to Dr. Russell in Saginaw and I LOVE LOVE LOVE her and her staff! My sis in law just had a baby and was very unhappy with her Dr. as well and I told her next time to look into getting with Dr. Russell as well. She didnt tell anyone they were pregnant til she was 3 months, and had already picked out a Dr. so it was too late then. Please look into Dr. Russell though, she is GREAT! Sorry you had to go thru that!

Kristi said...

Wow... just... wow. I don't even know what to say, Holli. Totally inappropriate on every level. On the bright side, it should be pretty easy to find a better dr. Gosh I'm so sorry that you had to deal with that crap.

Spellbound said...

How frickin insensative! I am sorry you had to go through that. I bet you wanted to say "that was me you are talking about asshole!" You should of!

Jayme said...

I have no words
I am so sorry you had such a crappy appointment!

Beth said...

That is horrible!!! Like everybody else, I have no words, but I just wanted you to know that you're not the only one who would be looking for a new doctor in that situation!