My best friend had her baby last Friday. A healthy baby boy who was born by emergency c-section after a difficult labor that involved his heart stopping. It was pretty scary, and my friend didn't get to see him until the day after he was born, but all is well now. He is beautiful. The first newborn I've held since my Brenna was born. I didn't get as emotional as I thought I would. I didn't get emotional at all, really. I enjoyed holding him.
As I was holding in, I did try to imagine what it would have been like if Brenna had been born alive. I couldn't. For the life of me I couldn't imagine it. It's like she just wasn't meant to be here.