Sunday, August 22, 2010

PARENTING LESSONS FROM THE "REAL HOUSEWIVES"

I have to admit that I watch all of the Real Housewives. (In fact the second D.C. episode is playing on my DVR right now!) I was watching an episode a few weeks ago from the New Jersey season. One of the mother's has a son who is in college and he struggles with a learning disability. He was notified that he could not continue his pre-law studies because his grades were too low. I'm sure I was like most mother's when my heart broke for this poor kid. He said he felt worthless (or something like that) and I really felt bad for him. I expected his mother to run to his defense and help him make things right.

I was surprised when she didn't.

I was even more surprised at his father's reaction.

Of course his parents were upset, but they told him this was his battle. His father said that if something like this stopped him from becoming a lawyer than he didn't deserve to be one!

At first I was floored. How could a parent not help their child? How could they not want to run to his side?

The more I thought about it the more I reflected on my parenting style? I would have done everything in my power to get my kid in another school, or to keep him in that school. I would have taken over (and I'm sure gotten things done).

But it wouldn't be my fight. It would be his. I would be doing him a disservice by not letting him earn his spot. He would never appreciate it because he didn't fight for it.

I really learned a lesson that day. Over these past few weeks I've began to change the way I parent. I see changes in my son already.

And my husband says reality TV is rotting my brain. What does he know!

1 comment:

The Beans said...

That does remind me of one of my teachers from school...a boy had been having a problem with another student and, when he informed the teacher about it, she replied "ohhhhhh...DEAL WITH IT."

Sounds mean but, overall, it would be a disservice if she had not acted otherwise.

-French Bean