Saturday, June 18, 2011

EMPLOYED

I've written about my employment issues here in the past, but have taken most of those down because I don't want to get sued! (Seriously). Long story short is that two years ago I went back to work and got a job that I didn't think I'd like, but actually loved. I was hired for sales, but moved into another position when I discovered I had a hidden talent for it. Truth is, I am very good at what I do.

The first year and a half at my job was pretty great. My husband started working there with me and it was an awesome time in my life. I loved going to work with him everyday. It was as close to perfect as I could have pictured.

I flourished at my job, and gained experience and became certified in several areas. I was building a reputation for myself, and had become known as an honest and trustworthy person to work with (in an industry that isn't always honest or trustworthy). I did almost $1 Million worth of business, which was huge for a company only in it's second year.

The owner of the company was pretty flighty and made some very poor business decisions. During my last several months with the company I began keeping a log about the things that were happening in the office. Illegal things I was asked to do. Illegal things my boss was doing. I was instructed to overcharge for services, and to submit false paperwork. I refused, and flat out told the owners that I was not going to do that, and if that is what they wanted they needed to find someone else. I don't lie for myself, I'm surely not going to lie for someone else! I don't know if he was into drugs or woman or what, but something very serious was going on. My last month there they couldn't even cover our paychecks.

The owner ended up laying me off on my first day back after Christmas. I saw it coming, and was actually relieved because working there had become unbearable. I dreaded work each day. My husband and I are a package, so if I went he automatically went too. Great, now we're both unemployed.

About three weeks after I was laid off I received a letter from my former employer that said my position had been consolidated with another and there was no position for me to return to at the company. Great. But I had a bad feeling about the letter. I didn't understand why they were sending it. I knew they were up to something. Two weeks later I found out what it was: they were fighting my unemployment. Saying I was fired for "not having the company's best interested in mind". I rebutted by sending in my log that I had been keeping, emails I saved, and the letter that they send me saying I was laid off. The very next week I received a decision from the state. They found that I was not fired for insubordination. I was in fact laid off. Basically they told my former employer that you can't lay someone off and then later tell them you meant to fire them instead. It doesn't work that way.

The lady I work with was "sent home" but not laid off or fired according to the owners. This was because she objected to him bugging our offices (no, I'm not kidding. Can you say paranoid?). She is still fighting for her unemployment because she didn't keep the records that I did.

Karma is a bitch because their business is circling the toilet. All the employees are laid off. They had a  family member take my position, and she didn't even know how to use the software. I don't feel bad for them one bit- you reap what you sow.

These are people I considered friends. We went on vacation to Hawaii together last summer! It stings, but I don't dwell on it.

My husband and I live in Michigan. The job market in this state sucks, to say the least. I did almost all of the work for the business, and when we were talking about how I did everything it dawned on us at the same time that we should just open up our own business. It's an idea we've been tossing around for the last six months. Now it is real. We are planning on opening our own business before the end of the year. I've done a lot of praying about it and I feel in my heart of hearts that this is the next step for my life. I had one crappy job that lead to the one I just had, and I know there has to be some reason for me going through all that.

So, my husband and I are going to put all our eggs in this basket and hope and pray that this is the path for us.

Eeeek!


Friday, June 17, 2011

IS THIS MY LIFE?

Even now, three years later. After all the healing I proclaim to have gone through. Even after coming to terms and accepting everything that has happened. Even after all of this, I still find myself jolted awake some nights and I find myself wondering, "Is this really my life? Did that really happen to me?"

And I still can't believe it.


Sunday, June 12, 2011

PUPPIES

My shih tzu had puppies last week. Oh my gosh! It was crazy! She labored all night and wouldn't let me sleep. I couldn't figure out if she was in labor or not because the vet (and everyone else) told me that I would know if she was in labor because she wouldn't eat. Well, she was still eating like a champ. I finally got up and spent a couple hours on the internet reading about dog labor and the signs. BIG MISTAKE! I must have read every horror story out there. Puppies heads falling off, the mom's dying... it was horrible. By the time my husband woke up at 6:30 I was in full on panic! He definitely had to talk me down and remind me that dogs have been giving birth since the beginning of time. In the end all that reading came in handy. She only had two puppies but they both were breech. The first one was pretty big, especially for a dog her size, and she freaked out a little and the sack broke and I ended up having to help her deliver him. Second one was smaller, the the same thing happened. After it was all said and done I felt like a doggy midwife.  :)  They both were boys. I am in love with them. I already have several people who want them, so I'm happy. 




Friday, June 3, 2011

TRAINED

I love animals. I have four dogs, and I love them all. My oldest is 13 years old. She was a rescue, and we got her when she was one year old. We have been through so much together. For the past 12 years she has been by my side. She holds a special place in my heart.

Like I said, I love my animals. My biggest pet peeve is an ill trained dog. I don't really blame the dog- it's the owner's fault.

Recently I was eating a sandwich and I set it down on the computer desk. My brother grabbed it "so the dogs wouldn't jump up and get it". I laughed at him, "My dogs won't touch that". He didn't believe me. I told him I could put that sandwich on the floor and my dogs wouldn't touch it unless I told them too. He still didn't believe me. So I did. I took the sandwich and put it on the floor. The dogs instantly ran towards it, but I made the "Eh!" sound. Which is the sound I make when I don't want them to do whatever it is they are doing. "No!" I told them, and they all backed away from it. We left it on the floor and they never touched it. My brother was pretty impressed. I was pretty proud of my "kids".

I didn't get unusually lucky with my dogs. They aren't exceptionally smart or anything. I just realize that my dogs aren't human. I treat them like dogs, not people.

Dogs don't think like people do. They live for the here and now. There are times when they are puppies that they are very emotionally fragile. If something traumatic happens, it will stay with them forever. But, for the most part a dog is all about what is happening right now.

They are pack animals. It doesn't matter if you have one dog or ten- you have to be the pack leader. A dog who thinks you are weak will try to take over from you. Some things we see as "jealousy" or "love" are actually your dog being dominate over you.

I have a friend who's dog humps her all the time.  She thinks it's because he loves her. It's actually because he's trying to dominate her. That's also why dogs will sometimes hump each other when they are playing. It's not about sex, it's about domination. Who's in charge? Who's the alpha dog?

Does your dog push his body up against you or put his nose under your hand trying to get you to pet him? Cute isn't it? He loves attention, doesn't he? Actually, no. He's dominating you. He's telling you what to do. "Pet me, I'm the boss". You should push him off or away from you when he does this. It has nothing to do with affection and everything to do with domination. To a dog space is respect. If your dog insists on sitting on your lap all the time or touching you, they are being dominate. You shouldn't let your dog do this.

My dogs learn from early on that I am the alpha. They know that there is no choice but to come when I call them. If your dog isn't coming, then they don't see you as the alpha.

My youngest dog is almost a year old. Since the weather has been getting nicer we've been taking him out with us more. At first he was really afraid. He would jump up on me wanting me to pick him up. He wasn't used to stranger people and animals. I refused to pick him up. I wanted to- I wanted to hold him like a baby and tell him everything was going to be O.K.. But if I did that then he would see me as weak. When a dog is afraid he needs his pack leader to be strong. If I would have picked him up and babied him then he would have never stopped being afraid. Instead, I gently tugged his leash everything he tried to jump on me. Every time he tried to dig his heels in I'd just keep walking. He realized that he had no choice but to walk, nothing was going to hurt him, and I was still in charge. We recently took him to a very large dog event. A few weeks ago he would have been terrified, but this time he was awesome. He was still nervous, but because I was strong and didn't baby him he quickly relaxed. The same thing applies to dogs who are afraid of thunderstorms or vacuum cleaners. If you pick them up and baby them when they are afraid you are only showing them that they have something to be afraid of. If you act in a self assured away, they will realize that the alpha isn't afraid, so they shouldn't be either.

This doesn't mean that you can't love on your dog and show them affection. You just have to know the right time and place for affection.

Now let me tell you. My dogs are not perfect. They misbehave (like the time my littlest one jumped on the table and ran for my don's birthday cake!). They don't know any tricks. But, they are generally well behaved and know their place in our home.